PHILADELPHIA--Just a week after providing a blueprint for the rest of the league to match up against the New England Patriots, the Philadelphia Eagles provided a blueprint for losing to the Seattle Seahawks. The blueprint included tossing four interceptions and missing several key tackles on defense.

“This is a copycat league, so I can see other teams watching this game film and mimicking it,” Fox analyst Howie Long said after the game. “The way that A.J. Feeley threw all those picks and the defense played so crappy and Andy Reid did such a weird job with the play calling was extremely effective in not winning this game. If I’m a coach and I want to lose to the Seahawks, I’m studying this one. The Eagles may be on to something here.”

According to Long, the entire league now knows the key to losing to the Seahawks: turnovers.

“Obviously you have to turn the ball over a lot,” he said. “I think you’re going to see a lot more teams doing that from now on against the Seahawks if they’re looking to lose. As for the ‘Hawks, they’re going to need to change things up a little. If they keep playing the way they played Sunday, they’re liable to win out the rest of the season, provided the competition is as shitty and bewildered as the Eagles were today.”

Eagles coach Andy Reid downplayed any talk of a blueprint, saying his team came to play and simply fell short.

“We had what we thought was a good game plan coming in and we just fell short,” he said. “Did we provide some kind of blueprint for the rest of the league? Maybe, but I think the bottom line is that we just lost the game. There are no moral victories in this league – except for our three-point loss to the Patriots last week. Man, that was a good game. Let's talk about that one instead.”

In Week 12, many thought the Eagles provided a blueprint for beating the Patriots when they combined a hard-hitting aggressive defense with a precise, quick-strike offense to take the undefeated Pats down to the wire. After that game, the Eagles came away feeling they could play with anyone in the league.

“That game gave us a huge confidence boost,” said safety Lito Sheppard. “We felt like if we could hang with a team like that we could hang with anybody. We felt like we sent a message to the rest of the league that said ‘Watch out. We just almost beat the New England Patriots.’ And you know what? That carried over into this week when we almost beat the Seahawks. Now we just have to keep this momentum going into next week.”

The Seahawks said they weren’t worried about the rest of the league having a blueprint to lose to them, as they would like the rest of the teams to lose to them anyway.

“I don’t know about all this talk about blueprints,” said quarterback Matt Hasselbeck. “To me it was just two good football teams who came in and competed hard against each other. If they did provide a blueprint to losing against us, that’s fine. We’d actually like other teams to copy it. Of course, we may have a few tricks up our own sleeves. Just when you think you have us figured out, we’ll go and hand the game to you on a sliver platter.”

Copyright 2007, The Brushback - Do not reprint without permission. This article is satire and is not intended as actual news.