TAMPA--Warren Sapp, All-Pro Defensive Tackle for the Superbowl Champion Tampa
Bay Buccaneers, may not seem like someone who needs more recognition, but
that’s not stopping the affable footballer from embarking on a coast
to coast campaign to raise awareness about himself.
“You hear so much about AIDS awareness, breast cancer awareness, stuff
like that,” says Sapp. “But you never here anything about Warren
Sapp awareness. For instance, did you know that I’ve been Defensive
Player of the Year, and I’ve been to the Pro Bowl, and I’ve
won a Superbowl? Did you know how funny and articulate I am? That’s
the kind of stuff I’m trying to spread around America.”
Sapp’s tour will include stops in dozens of major American cities to
promote himself and spread the word that Warren Sapp is a great guy.
“That’s really the message I’m trying to send,” said
Sapp yesterday at a press conference. “I’m a super guy. Everyone
that knows me knows that. I’ve got it all – looks, talent, personality.
But there are still a lot of people across America that don’t know about
me and my attributes. So its time for me to raise a little awareness.”
To kick off the campaign, Sapp organized a Warren Sapp Awareness 10k run in
the city of Tampa. The run traversed through the city, and participants raised
money by recruiting sponsors. All of the proceeds will go to the Sapp Awareness
campaign.
“It was a great chance to come out and meet new people and run in a
race,” said Sapp. “But it’s also for a good cause. The cause
of drawing more attention to the beautiful specimen that is Me.”
The run has raised close to $20,000 dollars. To thank the participants, Sapp
sent each one an autographed 8 X 10 and an official “Runnin For Warren”
T-shirt and button. Bumper stickers and other accessories are available at
www.warrensapp.com
A media blitz is also under way. Sapp is making the rounds of all the major
media outlets, and has granted interviews to dozens of publications. He is
featured on the cover of this week’s Sports Illustrated, in
which he discusses his unconventional campaign.
“I’m just so great,” Sapp pointed out to interviewer Frank
Deford. “Every time I look in the mirror I think ‘Does the rest
of America realize what they’re missing?’ I’m the best defensive
player in the league. Everyone knows it. And if that’s not enough, now
I’m scoring touchdowns. Isn’t that something? I just want to invite
the rest of America to bask in the glory that is Warren Sapp.”
The first stop on his whirlwind tour of the nation was nearby Atlanta, where
he held a press conference to “introduce himself” to those who
are unfamiliar with him. He then held a Q & A with members of the press.
The most commonly asked questions were “What are you thinking?”
and “Why are you here?”
After the press conference, Sapp regaled those present with a videotape montage
of his greatest moments. While the tape rolled, Sapp sat back in his chair
and marveled at his accomplishments, laughing out loud at his hilarious on-field
antics.
“Ha! That was hilarious!” cried Sapp. “That was my favorite
part. You know when I did that little booty shake in the end zone? How funny
was that? Rewind the tape. Let’s watch it again”
He then proceeded to a large shopping mall in downtown Atlanta, where he signed
autographs in a sporting goods store. Fans were charged 25 dollars an autograph.
“Of course I didn’t want to give the autographs away for free,”
said Sapp. “That would’ve given the impression that I’m
just some normal guy, a regular player. By charging 25 dollars for a handshake
and an autograph, I’m helping people understand that I’m better
than they are, and they should be honored by my presence. Aren’t I delightful?”
Fans reportedly came out in droves to see the star. He even went around town
and shook hands with the locals, looking a little like a politician running
for office.
“No,” smiled Sapp. “I don’t have any political aspirations.
I just want people to know what they have here. I’m a national treasure.
If I don’t let people know, who will?”
One woman who met Sapp was quite taken with his charm and personality.
“He was a very nice man,” said Mildred Flanders, 78. “Very
polite and with very nice manners. I’m so glad he came to town to raise
my awareness of him. I really had no idea he was so great. That is, until
he handed me this pamphlet detailing all his personal and professional accomplishments.
Very helpful - and I didn’t even ask.”
Next week Sapp has planned an all day telethon in an effort to raise more
money and “a-warren-ness”. He will have live entertainment, dozens
of phone operators waiting for donations, and will even perform a song himself
with special guest star Beyonce.
“Yea, we got Beyonce. We're gonna do Wind Beneath My Wings,”
said Sapp. “That'll give her an opportunity to express her true feelings
about me. What we’re going for is sort of a Jerry Lewis telethon type
thing. Except we’re trying to outdo those bastards. It’s my sincere
hope that we put the Jerry’s kids telethon out of business and replace
it with the Warren Sapp Awareness Telethon. I mean, doesn’t Muscular
Dystrophy have enough money by now? Jesus Christ, what are they spending it
on anyway? Find a cure already. People have better things to spend their money
on…like me, Warren Sapp.”
|
 |