PITTSBURGH--On Tuesday, Johan Santana’s agent, Peter Greenberg, revealed that his client was willing to take less money to go to the Pittsburgh Pirates, who are talking to the Twins about a possible sign-and-trade for the free agent to be.

“Johan would definitely take less money to play for the Pirates,” Greenberg told the Star Tribune today. “He’s always had a soft spot for the steel city. Plus, he wants to play closer to home and Pittsburgh is actually closer to Venezuela than Minnesota, New York, and Boston.”

Santana also likes the direction the Pirates organization is headed and feels that GM Neal Huntington is one of the brightest young minds in the game.

“He’s been an admirer or Neal’s ever since he was assistant director of player development with the Expos back in ’95,” Greenberg said. “He feels he’s taking this club in the right direction. Johan would much rather be on an up and coming team like the Pirates than an expensive powerhouse like the Yankees or Red Sox. That’s just how he is. Hopefully the Pirates have enough trading chips to acquire him. How about giving away Ian Snell? He’s never going to amount to anything.”

Santana got a chance to play in Pittsburgh during the 2006 All-Star game. He commented at the time that PNC Park was “awesome” and that he could definitely see himself playing there some day.

“This place is great. This is my kind of town,” Santana said before the game. “I could definitely see myself playing here. When do I become a free agent anyway? 2009? Damn, I could be dead by then. Hopefully the Twins will just trade me before I even become a free agent so they can get something in return. That sounds like the kind of chicken shit thing they would do.”

The market value for Santana is believed to be in the $20 million per year range, a figure the Pirates can’t afford. That’s why the left hander has agreed to lower his demands. It’s the Pirates’ hope that he can be had for a 5-year, $50 million deal.

“It’s flattering to know Johan wants to play for the Pirates,” said Huntington. “We can give him like $10 million a year for 5 years. On top of that, we can give him the experience of playing in a wonderful baseball city. New York and Boston are good, but they can also be a little obnoxious. At least Pirates fans have been beaten down by years of defeat and failure so they’re not always screaming and cheering and stuff.”

If the Twins can’t come to an agreement with the Pirates, Yankees, or Red Sox, there’s a chance they could hold on to Santana until he becomes a free agent in 2009. GM Bill Smith said the team has no intention of unloading Santana for anything less than a blockbuster package.

“A team will really have to blow us away to get us to part with Johan,” said Smith. “I don’t care if we’re going to lose him next year. That doesn’t mean we have to sell him for six cents on the dollar. I know he really wants to go to the Pirates, but that’s not really our problem. Our problem is that he doesn’t even want to give us, his current team, a hometown discount, and if he did we still wouldn’t sign him. There are lots of other problems too.”

Copyright 2007, The Brushback - Do not reprint without permission. This article is satire and is not intended as actual news.

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