WALTHAM, MA--Police in Waltham, MA arrested a member John Olerud’s posse in a nightclub shooting Saturday night. The incident took place at the Spin nightclub in downtown Waltham and apparently started with a dispute over a female patron. Olerud was present at the time but was not directly involved in the shooting.

A police spokesman said the suspect, 23-year-old Randall “Big Hustla” McCants, was well known to authorities.

“Mr. McCants has been in trouble before, and so have other members of this posse,” said Lt. John Hanks, of the Waltham PD “They like to go around to clubs and bars looking for trouble. They think they’re pretty important because they hang with John Olerud, the professional ballplayer. However, Mr. Olerud and his posse are not above the law.”

According to Hanks, the trouble started when a female patron approached Olerud at the bar. The two talked briefly before a group of men, one of whom was the woman’s boyfriend, approached and had words with Olerud. The result was a violent brawl that culminated in McCants firing his gun and hitting 25-year-old Jermaine McDougal in the leg. McDougal was treated and released from a local hospital, while McCants is being charged with assault with a deadly weapon. Witnesses described the scene as “chaotic.”

“As soon as I saw Olerud’s posse come over, I knew there was gonna be trouble,” said Ray Ferrara, a bartender at the Spin nightclub. “They came over and started jawing with these guys, pushing and shoving, that kind of thing. And Olerud was really the instigator. He kept talking smack to the other guys and then hiding behind his friends. He was like ‘Is this your bitch? She’s got a nice ass, motherfucker.’ You know, stuff like that. Anyway that’s when all hell broke loose.”

After some words were exchanged, the fighting began.

“I think it was this guy named Darius who threw the first punch. Then that was it. It was chaos,” said Ferrara. “Everybody was screaming, all the customers were afraid, even I thought I might get shot. The funny thing is that Olerud was standing off to the side the whole time, casually sipping a drink and laughing. At one point someone did throw a bottle at his head, but it shattered against that batting helmet he was wearing.”

The Red Sox have said they are “disappointed” in Olerud, but pointed out that he was not charged with any crime. GM Theo Epstein did say, however, that Olerud should find some new friends.

“Fortunately John was not involved in this infraction directly, however we advise all of our players to be careful about who they hang around with,” said Epstein. “In this business, there are troublemakers and hangers-on that do not always have the best interest of the players in mind. I’m sure John values his baseball career and wouldn’t want it jeopardized by getting in with the wrong crowd. Hopefully this will be a wake-up call for him. It certainly has been for me. I thought he was gay.”

The team has decided against suspending Olerud, and he is expected to play in tonight’s game against the Kansas City Royals. Manager Terry Francona said he was relieved that Olerud escaped without injury.

“Anytime you hear something like that it’s pretty scary,” said Francona. “I know John has had his share of problems in the past. He has made some questionable decisions with regard to the places he goes and people he hangs around with. But that doesn’t mean he’s a bad guy. We just need to reach out to him and let him know that he needs to make better decisions. If anything happened to him I know it would be just devastating to his family. Worse yet, it would force me to start Kevin Millar at first base.”

Copyright 2005, The Brushback - Do not reprint without permission. This article is satire and is not intended as actual news.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 





Member Of John Olerud’s Posse Arrested In Nightclub Shooting

August 23, 2005 - Volume 2 Issue 5