NEW YORK--Knicks coach Larry Brown filed a formal complaint yesterday against team president Isiah Thomas, accusing him of “an ongoing pattern of sexual harassment and intimidation” in the months since Brown took over behind the bench.

It is the second such allegation in the past week for Thomas. The first was made by former front office worker Anuncha Brown Sanders, who claims she was fired after making her complaints.

Brown is said to be preparing himself for a similar fate.

“Coach Brown has filed a formal complaint with MSG management regarding sexual misconduct on behalf of Isiah Thomas,” a spokesperson for the Knicks said today. “We will investigate these claims and if Mr. Thomas is guilty of any wrongdoing he will be dealt with in an appropriate manner. Of course, if these turn out to be false accusations, Mr. Brown will no longer be employed by the New York Knicks. We have informed him of that. He seems perfectly OK with it.”

A source close to the situation called the accusations “outrageous” and said that many people in the Knicks organization are suspicious of Brown’s motives.

“These allegations are almost laughable,” said the source. “To imagine Larry Brown being sexually harassed by Isiah Thomas is just ridiculous. If you ask me, he’s just posturing. I think he knows what happened to Mrs. Sanders when she complained to the higher-ups, and he’s just looking for a way out. This incident is consistent with Larry’s track record of weaseling out of contracts. I’ve never seen him sink this low, though, not since that time in Philadelphia when he faked his own death.”

According to the complaint, Thomas spoke inappropriately to Brown several times in the past few months and even tried to hug and kiss him on occasion. When Brown resisted, Thomas called him a “dork” and a “stick-in-the-mud.”  Recently, Brown said that Thomas’s behavior had grown worse, culminating in an incident in which he placed a pubic hair in Brown’s cereal, along with a note saying “Bon Appetit – Isiah.”

Brown demanded Thomas cease his abusive behavior, but to no avail.

“This is basically a last resort for me,” Brown told reporters after practice. “I’ve tried confronting Isiah about this face-to-face but it hasn’t helped. Now it’s in the hands of MSG management. In my opinion, Isiah needs to be fired. But if they can’t prove my allegations then I’m prepared to accept the consequences of being released from my contract. It’s a big price to pay but I have to stand up for what is right.”

It’s been a tough week for Thomas. Just days after holding a press conference to dispute the allegations of Anuncha Brown Sanders, he was forced to hold another press conference to deal with Brown’s allegations.

“I was stunned when I heard of Larry’s statements,” Thomas told reporters yesterday afternoon. “The notion of me sexually harassing him is utterly ludicrous. I am prepared to fight these charges tooth and nail in order to restore my name. I have never sexually harassed Larry. If I was going to sexually harass a man, it wouldn’t be Larry Brown. Eww, he’s gross.”

Thomas also advised Brown to concentrate on getting the team back on track rather than pursuing frivolous, unfounded allegations. The Knicks are currently sitting in last place in the Atlantic division with a 12-28 record.

For Brown, that’s easier said than done.

“I’m doing my best to concentrate on the team, here, but there are certainly plenty of distractions right now,” Brown said. “It’s hard to understand if you have never been a victim of sexual harassment. I know that I have put my career here in jeopardy by standing up to Mr. Thomas. If this is my last hurrah in New York, than so be it. The most important thing for me is to leave here with my dignity, my self-respect, a small cash settlement, and the opportunity to sign with a team that has a chance to compete before the year 2012.”

 

 

 

Copyright 2006, The Brushback - Do not reprint without permission. This article is satire and is not intended as actual news.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Brown Accuses Thomas Of Sexual Harassment In Attempt To Get Fired

January 31 , 2006 - Volume 2 Issue 28